


Bee's Raps: A Collection of Raps and Parodies

by Rhov



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Large Breasts, Song Parody, rapping
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-05-26
Updated: 2013-06-17
Packaged: 2017-11-10 23:39:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/472009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhov/pseuds/Rhov
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A hilarious collection of raps and parodies for Killer Bee and crew! It's like Weird Al Yakovic, but for Naruto. ^_^ I take requests.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shinobi's Paradise

**Author's Note:**

> _These rap parodies are meant for Killer Bee and crew. I ended up with a bunch because they're so fun to write. Just a suggestion: it's more entertaining to listen to the songs on iTunes or YouTube while reading along to see how the parody fits in with the music, unless you know the song really well already. If you have a song you want me to parody, just let me know. I'm eager to do more!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _This one is based on when Killer Bee and Naruto met up with Tsunade and the Raikage._
> 
> _Disclaimer: I don't own "Naruto" or "Gangster's Paradise." Parodies are legal under copyright law._

**Shinobi's Paradise**

(parody of _Gangster's Paradise_ by Coolio)

_[Verse 1: Killer Bee]_  
As I leap through the valley to kick Akatsuki's ass  
I take a look up ahead, my bro and some lovely lass.  
Now I've been rappin' and laughin' so long that  
Even Naruto thinks that my mind is gone,  
But I ain't never crossed a dame like this little game.  
Me be staring like a perv, you know that's unheard of.  
You better watch how you're pouncin', your boobs are bouncin'  
Did Naruto really say that she was fifty and countin'?  
I really hate to gawk, but I gotta look.  
As they bounce I see my bro with a dirty look, fool!  
I'm the kinda Bee the little genin wanna be like,  
Leapin' trees in the night,  
Rappin' songs in the moonlight.

 _[Chorus]_  
We've been spending most our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
Fighting with our kunai knives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
I admire how Naruto strives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
But we'll probably give our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.

 _[Verse 2]_  
Look at the situation, they got me facin',  
I can't live a normal life, a jinchuriki am I,  
And you know I am _down_ with the Hachibi.  
Too much chakra trainin', now Naruto is chasin' dreams.  
I'm the eight-tail's host, rapping all of the time,  
Got my pen in my hand and a song in my mind.  
I'm the Lord Jinchuriki, don't you be messin' with me.  
When my Ox dude is down, don't you arouse his anger, fool.  
Death ain't nuthin' but a heart beat away.  
I'm livin' life as a shinobi, what can I say?  
She looks twenty-three, no way is Tsunade fifty-four,  
How do those boobies stay up? Well, I dunno.

 _[Bridge]_  
Tell me why are we - so blind to see  
That the ones they hunt - are jinchuriki?

 _[Chorus]_  
We've been spending most our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
Fighting with our kunai knives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
I admire how Naruto strives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
But we'll probably give our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.

 _[Verse 3]_  
Hokage and my brother, bro and the Hokage,  
Booby after booby, lowcut shirt is cut low.  
Everybody's fightin', but half of them ain't livin'.  
It's goin' down in the mornin', me and Naruto be winnin'.  
They say I gotta hide, but nobody here can stop me.  
If they can't understand it, how can they reach me?  
I guess they can't - I guess they won't,  
So these two jumped, and now I'm staring at the Hokage's chest, fool.

 _[Chorus]_  
We've been spending most our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
Fighting with our kunai knives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
I admire how Naruto strives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.  
But we'll probably give our lives  
Living in the Shinobi's Paradise.

 _[Bridge]_  
Tell me why are we - so blind to see  
That the ones they hunt - are jinchuriki?  
Tell me why are we - so blind to see  
That the ones they hunt - are jinchuriki?


	2. Staring At The Hokage's Chest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's sorta silly, just came up with it. No parody, just me having fun with Bee's obsession with middle aged women's chests, particularly written for chapter 540.  
> http://www.mangahere.com/manga/naruto/v57/c540/16.html

Uh-huh, listen up, yo!

She thundered out of the sky like a demoness.  
A succubus, my goddess!  
Her hair like a whip of gold  
Her brown gaze so bitter cold.  
They said that she was old,  
Baa-chan, you ain't old, babe.

Yo, she was the Hokage!  
Sweet Lady Tsunade!  
Never seen a chick like this lady.  
Whoa baby!

Look out!

[ _Chorus_ ]  
Bro said, "What are you doing staring at the Hokage's chest?"  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
Here I am, staring helpless at the Hokage's chest,  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
She jumped and they jiggled.  
She walked and they wiggled.  
Thought that maybe I jizzled.  
Then bro spoke, and I fizzled.

Big bouncing gazongas are the way  
To get me hot over the Hokage.

My bro was there looking cool,  
And I'm there staring like a fool,  
Staring at Tsunade's chest.  
Ignoring all the rest.

Naruto, he's alright,  
Gonna run out into a fight,  
Lives in a village with this goddess,  
My lovely slug princess!

Lucky bastard!

[ _Chorus_ ]  
Bro said, "What are you doing staring at the Hokage's chest?"  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
Here I am, staring helpless at the Hokage's chest,  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
She jumped and they jiggled.  
She walked and they wiggled.  
Thought that maybe I jizzled.  
Then bro spoke, and I fizzled.

106 centimeters of goodness.  
106 centimeters of womanliness.  
106 centimeters of my goddess.  
Goddess, Kami, I can't stop staring!

Yo, they bounced!

Her hair like a whip of gold  
Her brown gaze so bitter cold.  
They said that she was old,  
Baa-chan, you ain't old, babe.  
You ain't old...yo!

Slug princess,  
My goddess,  
Big-breasted succubus,  
Fifth Hokage Tsunade.

[ _Chorus_ ]  
Bro said, "What are you doing staring at the Hokage's chest?"  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
Here I am, staring helpless at the Hokage's chest,  
But I can't help it, I like it.  
She jumped and they jiggled.  
She walked and they wiggled.  
Thought that maybe I jizzled.  
Then bro spoke, and I fizzled.

Big bouncing gazongas are the way  
To get me hot over the Hokage.


	3. Ain't Nuttin' But a "B" Thang

**Ain't Nuttin' But a "B" Thang**

(a parody of Dr. Dre and Snoop Doggy Dog's _Ain't Nuttin' But a "G" Thang_ )

 _[Killer Bee singing, italics are Naruto]_  
One, two, three and to the four  
The Great Killer Bee and Naruto is at the door  
Ready to make an entrance, so back on up  
( _'Cause you know we gonna rap this up_ )  
Gimme the kunai first, so I can fight in a rumble  
Kumo and Konoha together, Akatsuki knows they in trouble

Ain't nuthin' but a "B" thang, baaaaabay!  
Two jinchuriki so we're craaaaazay!  
Raikage's my bro that saaaaaves me!  
Unbeatable, so please don't try to beat this ( _Believe it!_ )

But uh, back to the rappin' at hand  
Nine tails is perfected, so I'ma let Naruto stand  
from this here B's retrospection  
And before we fight out a war I have ta' face the two kages intervention.  
Tsunade! She could be bruisin' a man  
and poundin' a man - and at the same time healin' a man.  
Now you know I ain't in that bit, you get it,  
Ain't no enemy good enough to get me worked up in a minute  
( _Yeah_!) And that's realer than the Double Lariat  
And now you ninja say "yo," know how I'm at.  
Well if it's good enough to get Uzumaki worked up  
I'll take a chance and jump into this warring stuff.

 _[Bee and Naruto]_  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
 _[B]_ Nar, leap through the woods like a phantom.

 _[Naruto]_  
Well I'm creep', and I'm leapin', and I leap-in  
But I dang near got caught, 'cause my Nine-Tail kept flailin'.  
Now it's time for me to make my skills to be felt  
So sit back, relax, and strap on your ninja belt.  
You never read a manga like this, y'see  
With a Killer Bee who can rap and control the Hachibi  
At the same time with that Dope rhymin' a bit  
You know, and I know, I believe it. Believe it!  
I rescued my old village, Konohagakure,  
Realize though, hear my joke, but don't choke.  
If you do, you'll have no clue  
On what me and my homey Killer Bee came to do.

 _[Naruto and Bee]_  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
It's the eight...  
 _[N]_ And who gives a flip about A?  
 _[B]_ So just chill, til the next Jump release...

 _[Killer Bee]_  
Fallin' back to the past, show what my bro and I mean  
Gettin' down with Yellow Flash, my one tentacle broke the scene  
It's the capital K, oh yes I'm Kool, I double-L, fool.  
E R, I'll send you there, a B, double-E, ya see.

Bumpin' my fist when Bro gets in our way  
Trainin' Naruto an' I get him like he was a bro some way  
Yeah, and it don't quit  
I think they forgot the Jinchuriki's up, Bee's it.  
( _Believe it!_ ) So Nar... ( _Whattup Bee?_ )  
Gotta give 'em what they want ( _What's that, Bee?_ )  
We gotta win the war or somethin' ( _Hell yeah!_ )  
And it's gotta be bumpin' ( _Ninjas are rockin'!_ )

 _[Naruto]_  
So where we gonna fight - yo, I asked, so hey listen,  
Glowin' like a lightning bug, but I ain't weakenin'  
Tappin' the fox's chakra, makin' the sucka bein' humble.  
When I'm on the jump, it's like a ramen, they all limpin'  
Try to get close, like a ninja you attack.  
My jinchuriki homie Killer Bee has got my back.  
Never let me slip, 'cause if I slip, then I'm slippin'  
But if I got my kunai, then you know I'm a'fightin'  
And I'ma continue to get Akatsuki, do a smack down  
And if Sasuke shows up, I'll have to take him back down.  
Yeah, and you don't stop,  
I told you I'm just like a rock, even A can't block,  
But I'm never mad, always glad, til the break of dawn.  
K-O-N-O-H-A, and the village they call Kumo  
Put an alliance together  
Like my ninja B.E.E, "Believe it!" "Yo see!"

 _[Naruto and Bee]_  
The eight, nine and eight and uh  
It's the eight and the nine and the eight and uh  
It's the eight  
 _[N]_ And who gives a flip about A?  
 _[B]_ So just chill, til the next Jump release.


	4. Look At Me Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, **cfine** challenged me to do Chris Brown’s “Look At Me Now.” You do realize, Busta Rhymes goes craaazy on this, right? I can’t even speak that fast on a triple espresso, LOL! Let’s go!

  
**"Look At Me Now"**  
(feat. Naruto and A)

_[Intro ‒ Killer Bee]_  
I don't see how you can hate watching the subs.  
You can't even read ‘em.  
Hahaha, let's go!

_[Verse 1 ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Yellow spiky prick.  
Yellow Flash zipping.  
Yellow Sun is shiny.  
Yellow stop missing.  
Yeah, yeah!  
What raps should I sing today?  
I get what you get in 16 years, in two days.  
Village loves me, I am the Lord Bee.  
If you get what I get, what would you say?  
She got the big top, Lady Hokage,  
And them lariate arms, hurry army.

_[Chorus ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Look at me now, look at me now.  
Oh, I'm getting stronger.  
Look at me now.  
Oh, look at me now.  
Yeah, we dudes are goin’ all-out.

_[Verse 2 ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Lil ninja gonna get all bigger  
'Cause I'm killing every ninja that try to be on my net.  
Better guard your neck if you want it, I can getcha,  
And I accidentally went and loosed Hachibi.  
Oops I loosed Hachibi.  
I ain't really mean to loose Hachibi  
But since we talking ‘bout Hachibi  
All of you ninjas say hi to it.  
I'm done.

_[Verse 3 ‒ Naruto]_  
Ayo Bee-san.  
Let me show you how to keep chakra flowing  
When you're doing that thing over there, homie.  
Let's go!  
'Cause I wanna be running  
And I'm feeling like I gotta get away, get away, get away.  
Better know that I’ll fight and I won't ever stop  
'cause you know I gotta win everyday day, day.  
See they don't really wanna stop me  
Just know that you’ll never rock me  
And I know that I can be a little cocky.  
Akatsuki never gonna stop me.  
Every time I fight a ninja gonna get it, then I gotta go, and then I gotta get it,  
Then the power flow, and then I gotta show that any little thing that ninja think he be doing  
'Cause it doesn't matter, 'cause I'm gonna jutsu, jutsu.  
Then I'm gonna blast-off everything with rasengan, odama even,  
I gotta do a lot of things to make it clearer to my fellow ninja  
That I'm always winning and I gotta hit, dattebayo, dattebayo, dattebayo.  
And I be learning it to death and now I smell a little foul.  
A ninja shower’s a def, and everybody knows my jutsu,  
And ninjas know I'm the best when it comes to doing this  
And I be banging out the toads, and I ride on a toad, and I'm eating up a load  
Of ramen, gonna eat more and I will never leave a mess  
In my bowl, slurp it up, or I can eat it on the go.  
Do you really wanna know what's next? Let's go!  
Sasuke has been gone and I’mma up in his face and you know  
We gotta blow, don't try to lag down from his pace.  
I’m struggling and hustling and learning it and getting it,  
Senjutsu gotta do it, put the Nine-Tails in his place.  
Ramen, taste it and I gotta grab it,  
And I gotta cut off all this hatred,  
Wanna sit on the Hokage throne,  
Better know I gotta have it, have it.

_[Chorus ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Look at me now, look at me now.  
Oh, I'm getting stronger.  
Look at me now.  
Oh, look at me now.  
Yeah, we dudes are goin’ all-out.

_[Verse 4 ‒ “A”]_  
Man sup these bichie ninjas, how y'all doin'?  
I'm with Tsunade, I'm the Raikage, I go violent, I go fast like some greased lightning.  
I love some sushi, watch my hit, Kumogakure, got me some curry,  
Got a bone to pick with two kids, jinchūriki, ain’t no wussy.  
I never lost a race but to Yellow Flash, got news flash, Naruto dash.  
Got some speed, that kid, got some nerve that whacked bro, I’ll teach ‘em.  
You ninjas ain't leavin', quit it, tell em Tsunade,  
But she said, "Let 'em", and I said, "Okay."  
If you wanna big shot then I'm the Big A.  
I don't care what you say, so don't even speak.  
You granny, old freak, tsundere-moe.  
Gotta liger bomb, and lightning speed,  
You boys can’t read, watch I’m outta your league, lightning release armor.  
You ain't faster than me, nope, not on my time and I'm not even trying.  
What's poppin' Bee? Fight with me, and if they struggle lariat them flat.  
I ain't got no time to chase your hide, these ninjas as dead as all that,  
Sharingan can’t even match my speed.  
Got Darue and C, can count on Bee.  
And my brother’s tight, and my robes are white,  
And my arm is sliced and my daddy's dead.  
You should be scared 'cause I'm too wild, been here for a while.  
I was like “Damn Akatsuki” I’ll put them down.  
I'm Lord Raikage, if you got eyes look at me now, Bee!

_[Chorus ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Look at me now, look at me now  
Oh, I'm getting stronger  
Look at me now  
Oh, look at me now  
Yeah, we dudes are goin’ all-out.

_[Outro ‒ Killer Bee]_  
Okay, kage.  
You wanna fight?  
We dudes are goin’ all-out.


	5. Tailed-Beast Power

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Request from **dudeaga**. I've never come across such intricate rhyming. Any fools who say rapping ain't poetry, just look at the rhymes 2pac uses in "Deadly Venomz." This is NOT your schoolbook iambic pentameter crap. This was one tough parody._

**Tailed-Beast Power**

(Parody of "Deadly Venomz" by 2pac)

_[Intro: Naruto]_

Yeah, we goin' fightin', ninja, fightin'!  
Yeah, you got Killer Bee in this, dattebayo!  
We got my ninja Sasuke from Akatsuki in this, dattebayo!  
Tsunade and Naruto's in this, dattebayo!

_[Verse One: Killer Bee]_

My paper bomb goes boom, get it soon, can I match it,  
Fightin' quick then a slick just tryin' to keep from gettin' blasted.  
I fought it hard and put up with those Akatsuki bastards.  
Boo ya! It was fun while it lasted.  
Now they after me, hunting for the ninja best.  
Time to see who's the Bee better than the rest.  
Yosh, yosh, you're up and livin' reckless.  
Ninjas with a death wish step in with a sign,  
And I'll match this, yeah and this kid is hyper.  
Jinchuriki fighting representing our kind, striking like a viper.  
Huh, we got our minds made up, he got his Nine  
Tails under wraps, and he taps chakra.  
Some ninjas need to feel us with a passion.  
I'm in fashion, you mess with me ninja and get blasted  
With my Tailed-Beast Powerz.

(Yeah Bee, screw that, still rappin' your words  
With that old rhyming stint.  
Aiyo, Baa-chan, where you at?  
Step up and get their heads up with some common sense.)

_[Verse Two: Tsunade]_

We come to hit you with a fist full of hurtin',  
Drag you away by your nose, brats are batty like fat cats  
Rat pack pat flat.  
We came to keep you from the war rough and rugged race  
And if you show your face I bash you to a soppy paste.  
And that's the fast fist flying,  
'A' shouts at Killer B, lariats bang em', shout, knock em' both out.  
Ask me? I think Naruto should go, oh boy yeah.  
Plus A's style ain't too fitting since he arm's gone,  
Naruto's quick just like his father, Yellow Flash, you picked a fight,  
Fightin' chosen ones with lightning flashing super speed, right.  
No rescue, they're off to fight,  
But get it right, 'cause if you ain't a perfect team I will say "Stop."  
Akatsuki lookin' for you, make ya weapons  
Like the others, got 'em, you'll be their deadly Tailed-Beast Powerz.

_[Verse Three: Sasuke] (A/N: Sasuke rapping would be sooo hot!)_

Yeah, as I get my eye, gotta fly, gonna die,  
Sharingan, new one, now I can try.  
I'm hit with hot chicks, got 'em damn fans, boom,  
Turn 'em down or take 'em to my room.  
Coming straight from the cave where I braved Madara's plan,  
Bam, Moon's Eye Plan, usin' Amaterasu.  
I hold a boulder of guilt upon my shoulder  
Going for that punk, spiked hair, like a brother.  
Youngest, reckless, crazy, disaster,  
Fire jutsu blaster, throw my knives faster  
Than a jonin, fight! I can't be stopped, revenge is my prop.  
A lot of ninja fighters will drop.  
I'm a disaster, wanna see my village all blood-splattered,  
I'll make 'em scatter, fightin' friends and teachers, don't matter.  
Blow 'em out the door, settle my score.  
Whore chick, Sakura, get out of my sight!  
Taka group, on the loop, gave my friends up and it's  
Something I don't wanna do, something that I never did.  
He tried to get me, wanted to save me, I showed him,  
I'm out, get stronger than Tailed-Beast Powerz.

(Yeah, Sasuke, come home, you know we want you,  
Know what I'm sayin'? Team Seven, Kakashi's the best.  
Now you know a ninja like me gotta save my friend,  
You know what I'm sayin', check it out.)

_[Verse Four: Naruto]_

Once again, find my friend, end, quick on the trump jump.  
Akatsuki, represent evil, you can suck me.  
Deadly, rock it Killer Bee, check the harmony,  
Ninjas can't touch me when I'm with this Bee you better flee.  
Cause I'm gifted with a Fox and 24/7 rocks,  
So ninjas flip or get a rip in your dingy socks.  
Uh, boom, you slipped up, now we'll rip up,  
Yeah, one more Ninja War, united, and get whipped up.  
Let's go, dattebayo, no matter how it goes,  
We take revenge, jinchuriki, you'll pay for hurting those.  
Let's fight a war you and me, Naruto and Bee.  
We ninja hit 'em and they cower before Tailed-Beast Powerz.

(Ninja, you know what I'm sayin'? Believe it,  
I told you, we're fighting evil, yo Bee!)

_[Verse Five: Killer Bee]_

I'm Hachibi power, you're nine Kyubi power,  
Strugglin' and strive, keep those nine really tight in line  
Like mine, you better follow me, Bee.  
Punk young ninja don't even learn from me, see.  
I got a rap in my cap, see the trap,  
You can't nap 'cause the war's almost there.  
As my bro and I reminisce about the old days.  
Fighting with my big bro, done hiding out low,  
I say ninjas need to get their mind right  
Until they do, our chakra's lit and get your Nine tight.  
Now its on, any day could be my last day  
That's why I rap on the gap as I flap let the glass spray.  
First you had strong ninjas armed.  
Now you're strong ninja's harmed.  
Bee's out punching guts.  
Tailed-Beast Powerz.

(Ha ha ha, yeah we beat those butts down there.  
Bee, how 'bout you clean this up?)

_[Verse Six: Killer Bee]_

Put out your signing hands, make the signs of the times, fine.  
Only thing I'm giving out is black bruises, I'll kick your ass.  
Let me tell you how rough I get  
Tentacles behind you back, slap in your face the same fit.  
You can't win it because my heart's bigger, I'ma bull ninja,  
My soul guides me so hard I sing the rappin' hinge, ya.  
I'm a hero to friends, my village loves me to no end,  
Test a rhyme I'll know your hairline to your rear end.  
Zetsu ain't got me, cut 'em like salami.  
Demonic Statue, oh me! We get 'em stickin' like honey.  
Knives up and move out, time to glower  
That's the results of messin' with the nine Tailed-Beast Powerz.

_[Outro: Naruto]_

Yeah, you know what I'm sayin'?  
Nine jinchuuriki Tailed-Beast Powerz, kick your butts for Gaara's pain,  
Pain's pain, Hinata's pain, we take ya all out,  
I'mma gonna take on all the pain that you dish out.  
You know what I'm sayin'? Follow us, come along,  
Dattebayo,  
We're fightin' this war until it's over, yo. Believe it!


End file.
